Some folks in the peanut gallery thought I was too negative last week. Guess what? I don?t care. Or, to channel The Rock, ?It doesn?t matter what you think!?
Achilles Heels says what he wants when he wants. It was one of my conditions when I agreed to write this column. My goal is not to be positive or negative. My goal is to be honest.
So, while Heel Turns takes a more positive tone this week, it?s not a response to anyone?s comments. The positivity is a response to all the good things that happened this week.
An outstanding Summer Slam. Ring of Honor does its first tapings for its new TV show. A story involving nude photos of Terri Runnels. What is there to complain about?
Sorry, perverts, you?ll have to wait until later in the column to learn about the photos of Runnels. Of course, if you were surrounded by beautiful women, as I am ? Sorry, that will never happen. But if you had contact with any half-decent women, perhaps you wouldn?t be so desperate to read about Runnels? photos.
*****
GRAND SLAM: Summer Slam delivered. And that doesn?t do it justice. Summer Slam was the WWE?s second straight top-notch pay-per-view, following July?s outstanding Money in the Bank.
John Cena vs. C.M. Punk was the main event, but I?m going to start with the no-holds-barred match between Randy Orton and Christian for the World Heavyweight Championship. Not only was it the best match of the night, but it was one of the best matches of the year.
Orton and Christian used trash cans, kendo sticks, steel steps and tables. But they used these props effectively. They built toward each spot and the spot made sense. They weren?t simply using foreign objects for the sake of using them. (Those who watched the dark match between these two following the July 26 Smackdown in Philly might have recognized the sequence with the kendo stick.)
Even Christian spitting on Orton made sense. A similar action at Money in the Bank caused Orton to lose his temper and get disqualified. Orton snapped again when Christian spit on him at Summer Slam, but it was a no-disqualification match. Orton used a series of objects and regained his title.
Before Summer Slam, some people said they were tired of seeing Orton battle Christian. I feel the opposite way. I?m sorry to see this feud end. Their worst match was good. But they saved their best for last. And I?d be remiss if I didn?t give a shout out to one of my all-time favorites, Edge, who delivered an energetic and effective in-ring promo before the Christian-Orton match.
The WWE title match between Punk and Cena was also terrific. It was not as good as their Money in the Bank classic, but that performance would have been difficult to duplicate. The presence of Triple H as guest referee was not a distraction. He called it right down the middle until his mistake at the end ? he missed Cena?s foot on the rope ? resulted in Punk becoming undisputed WWE champion.
The match was very good, yet the buzz this week is about what happened after the match. Kevin Nash (yes, that Kevin Nash) came out of the stands and gave Punk a jackknife powerbomb. Then Alberto Del Rio cashed in his Money in the Bank title match opportunity and quickly pinned Punk for the undisputed WWE Championship.
I?ll have more on Nash and Del Rio in a few moments. First, I?m going to praise the rest of the card.
The match between Mark Henry and Sheamus was a good big man?s power match that featured a tremendous moment at the end, with Henry plowing Sheamus through the barricade. Kelly Kelly used a creative reversal of the ?Glam Slam? to surprise Beth Phoenix and retain her Divas Championship. Wade Barrett defeated Daniel Bryan in a solid, realistic-looking bout that made both participants look good. The show opened with a fun six-man tag team match in which John Morrison, Kofi Kingston and Rey Mysterio beat R-Truth, The Miz and Del Rio.
I stand by my complaint that the WWE didn?t properly promote the undercard. It took a little while before the crowd warmed up to the excellent Bryan-Barrett match. If that match had been promoted ahead of time, the crowd may have been into it from the start.
But it?s difficult to complain when the final product was so good. With a match of the year candidate (Christian-Orton), a very good main event with an interesting twist at the end and a solid undercard, Summer Slam was a terrific pay-per-view.
*****
DIESEL POWER: The return of Kevin Nash was a huge surprise. Whether his return is a good thing depends on how WWE uses the man formerly known in the WWE as Diesel.
If he is used as an instrument of Triple H or someone in the McMahon family, I like the idea. If this leads to Nash getting back in the ring, then it?s a mistake. Anyone who has seen Nash in the ring the last few years knows he?s not very mobile. He could be used in a six-man tag team match or, possibly, even a regular tag-team match once or twice without getting exposed, but his dyed beard and hair won?t cover up the fact that he can?t wrestle.
*****
CHAMPIONSHIP MATERIAL: As you should already know, I would have delayed Punk?s return and continued the storyline of who is the legitimate WWE champion. Even after the Summer Slam match was announced, I still thought there was a way to continue the champion vs. champion feud between Punk and Cena. However, I?m pleased to see Alberto Del Rio with the championship.
Del Rio has charisma and had developed a strong character. The new luxury car every week and having his own personal ring announcer are nice touches. He is cultured, yet he can be vicious. He exhibits skills on the microphone and in the ring after the bell rings. His insincere apologies are perfect for his character.
Most importantly, Del Rio can deliver in the ring. He has been involved in some terrific matches with Rey Mysterio, including his first defense of the WWE title on Monday?s RAW.
Wealth. Good looks. Charisma. Talent. In a lot of ways, Del Rio reminds Achilles Heel of ? Achilles Heel! As the Greek god of wrestling, I can give no higher compliment.
*****
CRIMSON MASK: I spent a lot of time last week ripping TNA. The criticism was well-deserved. But this week I am praising TNA for Kurt Angle?s destruction of Crimson at the end of last week?s Impact Wrestling.
The convoluted Dixie Carter/control of the network storyline has dragged on forever, but I like Angle?s explanation that he?s going to get back at Carter by destroying the young talent in TNA. His first victim was Crimson.
I don?t want to see young talent buried, so that?s not why I?m in favor of Angle injuring Crimson. But TNA had a problem. Crimson was leading the Bound for Glory Series; however, despite a monster push, it?s become increasingly clear that he?s not over with the fans. Having Crimson in a prime position on a pay-per-view because of his points lead in the Bound for Glory Series could have resulted in an embarrassing situation, with fans booing or sitting in silence during an important pay-per-view match. Having Angle take out Crimson was a creative solution to TNA?s problem.
*****
PHOTO FINISH: Sorry, just teasing you. You?ll have to wait a little longer for the story about the naked Terri Runnels photos.
*****
YOUNG LIONS: CHIKARA will hold its 9th annual rookies tournament, known as the Young Lions Cup. The event takes place over two days, August 27-28, at the Palmer Center in Easton. (For some of you, this would also be a good opportunity to stop by the Crayola factory in Easton to pick up some new crayons with which to write me hate letters.)
Saturday night?s show will feature four four-way elimination matches, with the winners advancing to Sunday?s show to participate in the Young Lions Cup semifinals and, if victorious, in the finals. There will also be ?12 Large: Summit? matches both days, as well as a Royal Rumble-style match involving 30 participants on Sunday. I?ll have more details on CHIKARA?s two-night stand in next week?s Heel Turns.
*****
WASTED TALENT: It has been several weeks since I?ve voiced this complaint, but it?s time to bring it up again. Why is WWE wasting Drew McIntyre?
The latest example was having McIntyre lose to Yoshi Tatsu at Fan Axxess (their spelling, not mine), a multi-day event which leads up to Summer Slam. Instead of burying him on non-televised shows, WWE should move McIntyre back to Smackdown, where they?re going to need new challengers to face Randy Orton.
*****
PHOTO FINISH (FOR REAL): All right, here?s the story on the naked pictures of Terri Runnels. Thank you for waiting patiently ? except for those of you that scrolled down to this item, skipping my earlier words of wisdom.
A Sanford, Fla., judge has ordered Jerome Young, known to wrestling fans as New Jack, from distributing naked photos of former girlfriend Terri Runnels, the former real-life and on-screen flame of Dustin Runnels, better known to many of you as Goldust (which makes ?flame? a poor choice of words on my part). The Order is in place until the duo, which split up earlier this summer, appear at a hearing scheduled for next Wednesday.
New Jack, however, says he can?t appear in court next Wednesday because he?s doing a comedy act in ? Philadelphia! I?ll bet the profane New Jack will have some new material for his act!
That?s all for this week. Have fun surfing the Internet looking for Terri Runnels photos!
Source: http://www.phillyphanatics.com/2011/08/18/heel-turns-musings-of-a-wrestling-god-15/
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